It's alive! Or contains carbon!

velvetpage bought some unrefined salt. Its packaging describes it as "organic."

Organic salt?

Organic salt?

Pardon me, while my inner tech writer fantasizes about hunting down and killing a marketing copywriter.

Atheists in Fox Holes

From the The Slacktivist.

"I don't really understand the saying, "There are no atheists in foxholes." The reality, as seen from the enduring cultural and theological repercussions of World War I, is rather that very few theists emerge from the trenches."

The Sexy Space Adventures of "Blood, Love and Rhetoric"

Some people have asked me about the Serenity game I was running. So, I shall tell you!

The players were members of an All-Girl (or IS it?) rock band, Blood, Love and Rhetoric. They traveled from gig to gig on the frontier in an aging Firefly-class freighter.

anidada was Izabel Mech, bassist. Izabel is a strapping punk girl with steel-capped boots who can kick your tail as well as break your heart!

catsarah was playing Zazu Tuscadaro, the manager/roadie, and owner/pilot of the Firefly ship. She kept a poisonous snake in her cleavage(!) and flew like a leaf on the wind. (Which is to say, straight down and spinning!)

nottheterritory portrayed Xiao Lin, back-up singer and tamborine player. Xiao Lin is a transsexual space commando with a mysterious past! (Well, it would hafta be...)

sassy_fae ran Charlie, the drummer! (The drummer is a girl!) Charlie is perpetually broke, and has a talent for turning pyrotechnics into demolitions. Charlie is also a master of Capoeira and turned to be a surprisingly good pilot.

velvetpage ran Violet Umbrage, lead vocalist. A former Companion (still registered with the Guild), Violet is telepathically sensitive and can really read a crowd.

The First Gig
The band got their first gig in weeks, on the ruggedly beautiful planet of New Provo. The club, "Mohammed's Radio", is a converted cargo container in the middle of wildnerness. It also serves as the broadcast tower for an unlicensed music channel. The club is located directly between two religious communities. Channingville, to the west, is a commune/data haven run by Universalist Unitarian Extremists. To the east is New Cave Valley, a faming town inhabited solely by Unreformed Latter-Day Polygamists.


The club owner, a weather-beaten, middle-aged, nerd named Zev, holds monthly all-ages "youth mixers," allowing teens from both communities to socialize. That's the gig. While watching the opening act, the band is surprised to see an audience of mostly proto-Goths and punk girls and boys, and really, really clean teenage boys in handspun plain garments.

They discover that the Unitarians Extermists take optimism very seriously. Listening to gloomy music is a means of rebelling, and while not entirely outlawed (very little is), it is considered highly unproductive and antisocial. The Mormons, for their part, are here looking have a little fun, but don't seem to know how to have it.


The band is approached by a very young and heavily corseted girl (Lacey) who asks for their help. She wants to run away from the Unitarian commune and join her fiancé among the Mormons. She is sick and tired of lax discipline, "anything goes" beliefs, and free love and longs for a life of faith and strict order. Somewhat perplexed, the band does decide to help her by transporting her and her fiancé back to the Mormon enclave.


Following the set anidada falls into conversation with a famous/notorious/secretive record producer, Mr. "Good Time" Eddie Filth. He tells her that her band has just the sort of look and sound he's looking for, and invites the group to come to a Battle of Bands in three weeks time, at Polyhymnia V.

Of course, things don't go as expected. When the next band is playing, a Unitarian raid takes place, led by Community Activities Coordinator Chad, who strides into the room waving a megaphone.


"I hold in my hand a permit for one All-Ages Spiritual Lovefest and Junior Tantric Introduction. I see an awful lot of black makeup for a Lovefest," he bawls, "and very LITTLE nudity!"

The band decides to run for it, grabbing Lacey and her fiancé as they run. Outside, catsarah deploys her cleavage snake against an officious Unitarian attempting to ticket the spaceship, and the gang makes a clean getaway…

Only to find themselves wanted for kidnapping, and in the middle of an interfaith/international incident. They also find out that Lacey actually has no idea what she's getting herself into, as her fiance reveals some unpleasant details about the barracks style living arrangements and austere life she can look forward to. Rather than get shot from the skies, they return Lacey to her family and chalk it up to misunderstanding.

The band performs an impromptu concert at the Unitarian Multi-Function Happiness Hall, ending with God Gave Rock and Roll to You with full gospel choir, massive pipe organ, and many electric guitars.

Then, they loaded up the spaceship for the next gig...